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Going #4000 to 40: It’s Not the Conversation, It’s the Self Talk Before

October 27, 2022 @ 10:00 am - 11:00 am PDT

Virtual Event Virtual Event


Presented by

Paul Haury, Belonging Coach, Heart Based Leading


The part of a bi-weekly series on Heart-Based Leading

Topic: Working with Difficult People/ Having Difficult Conversations  

The story you tell yourself is the story you live. And it’s almost impossible to change that story when you’re moving at 4000 words per minute, for yourself, let alone in hopes of influencing another to move towards a common goal with you. Imagine reading a road sign, as you speed by it at 4000 miles an hour. 

While talking and listening in belonging, our mind slows down to about 40 words per minute. Your heart’s road signs, the cairns to your promised land, come back into view. You get there easier and faster. Slow is smooth, smooth is fast. 

We’ll dive into this in a TEDx-like conversational and interactive experience, to give you an understanding of your belonging to help you see the road signs and avoid your potholes. 


  • The speed of self-talk, 4000 wpm
  • Your Gator vs Your Judge (guess which makes 90% of your decisions)
  • They have a Gator and a Judge too
  • Conflict happens in collaboration, not outside of it, The 4 Goals of Conflict


  • Get aware of yourself and your story at 4000 & 40 wpm
  • Understand that everybody has a Gator (that’s your superpower)
  • Get connected with how you can approach conflict at 40 wpm 


Paul guides people to experience belonging, in self-belonging, in their own brilliance, and within their company tribes, to really live & perform better than they ever imagined. He’s been an IT Director, a construction and a tech entrepreneur, a teacher, a building maintenance mechanic, child development counselor, marine mechanic, and a McDonald’s employee. In his most recent endeavors, he’s served as VP of people & culture and as a professional coach, specializing in belonging and optimal performance for individuals and OrgDev.

“I’ve found that we perform at our highest when we belong and believe in shared purpose together. There in belonging, we simply fear less and aspire more.”

He’s a guy who loves using belonging to get people living into their brilliance of their work & personal lives. In service of that, he coaches, he mentors, he chooses optimism & does his best to learn what motivates each person to work with how they can fully live, be better and get into their promised land. For those really committed to making what they have GAS (give-a-sh!#), getting unstuck, and shifting to their extraordinary level, he is their second heart and sets of eyes & ears, to help move them through their fears and deep into their aspirations.

Follow him on social media:

Website: https://www.heartbasedleading.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/paul-haury/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/PaulHaury

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/phaury/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/PaulDHaury

Who Can Attend & Fee

Event limited to only members of The Koa Club and their guests

Location/ Date & Time

Online via Zoom only:


*****Zoom link will be provided in the RSVP confirmation email******

****** Members can also go to the event page to get the Zoom link if logged into the Membership portal****

Date: Thursday, October 27, 2022

Time: 10:00am –11:00amPT/11:00am-12:00pmMT/12:00pm-1pmCT/1:00pm-2:00pmET


October 27, 2022
10:00 am - 11:00 am PDT
Event Category:


Online Only
Via Zoom link provided United States + Google Map